Monday, April 30, 2007

back into the groove, and boy do I like it there.

Woop! Woop! Two pages done from last night and this morning. I think I have officially killed that Anna Griffin paper because it is one of my favorites since it came out. I have used it in some way in three layouts from this year.

Someday my kids will look through albums and say, "Hey 2005 was the year of Chiffon Bazzill, 2006 was the year of the big flowers, and 2007 is the year of Anna Griffin." Hey, I guess if I like something I might as well beat it into the ground right?

I think if you click on the page you can see the journaling.

I have a couple more pages to work on today since I have a deadline for Devine Memories. I got some cool stuff to work with this month, so I can't wait to start. (Nothing like putting it off until the last moment though.)

Sunday, April 29, 2007

horse love.

A super duper quick one that I did last night during CSI. :)

I still love these pictures of Megan, and quite timely since we went to riding lessons again yesterday morning.

I'm trying to get back into the groove with scrapping this week. I have taken too much time off from it since Mike has been out of town. By the end of the day I'm way too tired to do anything scrap related. I missed it though, so it made me realize again how much I enjoy this hobby.

I'm even working on another one today, so hopefully I'll post that one later.

Happy weekend! Woohoo!

Saturday, April 28, 2007

blades of glory

I was invited by a friend to go see a movie today, plus I was lucky enough to find a sitter.

We went to see Blades Of Glory. I have been looking forward to this movie since I saw the trailer a long time ago! Oh my gosh, it was so funny!!!

Sometimes you just have to love dumb humor!! Just looking at Will Ferril makes me laugh, and I love John Heder ever since seeing Napoleon Dynamite the second time. That movie changed my life. I probably qoute from it once a day.

So these two together I knew would make for a funny movie. Add to that the funniest story ever from my friend right before we left. I was already in tears in the parking lot before the movie. It requires a visual, so if you see me sometime be sure to ask. It was like a Seinfeld moment!

I loved that Jenna Fischer (the office) and Amy Poehler (SNL) were in this too.

Anyway, funny stuff. I'm so glad I got to see it in the theater and glad to have gotten out today.

The weather... holy cow, what is up with this and did anybody expect it? When we got out of the movie there was a wall of dirt. Usually something that you see during monsoon season around here. It was a storm that came in fast, and now we are getting sprinkles! Yessss! <-- see.... Napoleon Dynamite. ;)

I'm going to go enjoy watching the storm. :)

Thursday, April 26, 2007

fun for a measly $3

Excuse the dirty window. That is something I am trying to embrace right now. The fact that everytime I clean the windows, we get just enough rain to come along and mess things up.

I am trying to come to the realization that I'm never going to be able to win. Mother Nature doesn't like me to have clean windows. Or it's her way of telling me to relax a little on the OCD cleaning.

Yes, another Target post. I bought these cute little pots from the $1 spot for the kids to do. They each came with a dirt pellet that you pour water on and then they expand. The kids LOVED that part. Fascsinating stuff right there! Then they each put their seeds in, covered them with more dirt and put them in the window for some sun. It is cute to see them go check their own pot to see if anything has changed.

We have chives, oregano and basil. Trevor (the future chef, who gets his culinary skills from his father) is waiting so he can use these for spaghetti sauce. I think we'll be waiting awhile.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

camouflage puppy

Two posts in one day. Just because I am that kind of girl. (bored.)

Can you spot the puppy?

That is A LOT of tan.

one seasoned pro and one newbie.

Seasoned pro if you count one whole week of riding her bike to school. But that is Megan. After a week of swim lessons, she swore she was ready for the Olympics. Of course, several riding lessons later, she is going to be on the U.S. Equestrian Team next year too. Hey the girl has confidence.
Today T decided he wanted to ride his bike to school. Megan promised she'd help him, and I followed them both all the way just to make sure. I turn in side streets so I can see them, but they feel like they are out on thier own. I'm not ready to have them out of sight yet. By the time they had gotten to the school Trevor comes up to my car and says, "Can I ride my bike to school everyday until the end of the school year?!?!?! That was awesome!!!" You bet little dude.
It is so cool to see them doing something like this. I remember riding my bike to school. Although, not in the first grade, but still... those were fun times. I didn't have as far to go though, so I can't even guilt them with the "When I was a kid...." stories.
I am SO proud of these guys. The little things that they get so excited about are such good reminders of how cool life really is.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

the countdown is ON

Oh, I almost forgot:

8 more days!!!!
Today was a pretty good day, and it went by so fast. I went out and did a lot of errands, and got a lot accomplished. Before I knew it, it was time to pick up the kids from school, then off to church for activity day. I had the boys with me tonight. Talk about fun, fun, fun. It is a thing for girls, in which I am one of the leaders, so I have to be working with them. The boys sat pretty well in the back of the room for awhile.

You would not believe the amount of messages left on my answering machine lately. Normally the box doesn't fill up for a long time, in fact I think months can go by without having to delete any of them. UNTIL little friends start calling for Megan. I swear, they leave messages longer than if Megan was actually talking to them. Or... some of the conversations end up on the machine because the phone got picked up late. All in all, I think there were 3 10 minute long messages for Megan on there. All deleted and I have a clean and empty mailbox again. :)

How do I know this? Three, count them... three people told me today when I saw them that my machine was full when they tried to call. It's crazy.

As you can tell there is absolutely nothing going on here. No random thoughts, or anything. I did however make it to the scrapbook store today, so hopefully I'll have time to do some work later tonight and post some things. :)


Sunday, April 22, 2007

ain't no party like a peas scrap party!

Wow, it is that time of year for scrapping people. CK convention time.

Last night was a night that I had been looking forward to for months. Thanks to all who made it possible:

Shanna, for hosting and working so hard putting everything together. You seriously rock at the planning. It was SO much fun.

Nana & Papa: for taking all three of my kids overnight so I could get out of the house and not have to worry about them. (And be able to sleep in a little after getting home at 2:00 a.m.) :)

Lisa: for keeping me company and for the awesome Autumn Leaves stamps that she bought for me! Somehow she has this idea that we like to travel. ???? ;) I'm anxiously waiting to use them next month. Mexico awaits!

I also got to talk a little with Jamie Harper who is a new HOF winner, and incredible photographer. I'll be giving her a call in the fall. She is adorable.

Seriously, last night was so much fun. I went to the 2Peas crop at the Hilton in Mesa. Shanna went crazy this year. She even had a dj, which was a blast. Who says that a crowd of over 30 year old scrapping moms don't know how to party?! There was a ton of great music (and one girl in particular who could shake her thang! Totally hysterical!) a TON of sugary sweet stuff to eat, lots of prizes and a lot of energy.

It was just what I needed after a month of solitude. I swear, I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

Just a huge thanks to everybody. This is just one more thing that I love about this hobby, the people are incredible and I love them.

Now I have to unpack all of this mess, get some caffiene, and retrieve children!

Thursday, April 19, 2007

some ramblings

I didn't know what to say about what happened at VT earlier this week. I figured that I wouldn't really blog about it because my feelings were pretty much what everybody else was feeling. Just sadness that the world is like this anymore, and trying to imagine what it is like for the parents of these students.

Today though, I was watching TV and caught a glimpse of my old high school. Corona del Sol. My nephew goes there right now so I immediately called my sister to see if he was ok. Apparently for the past couple of weeks there have been threats written on the bathroom walls, and earlier this week a tree was burned in the front of the school with another note by it that said the same kind of threats. My sister told me how this was news on CNN. My old high school on CNN??? I just can't fathom that, but there were images of all of the students sitting out in the football field after being evacuated from the school.

Then I hear on the news about how a student at a school in Seattle had brought three guns to school. - Not to use, but to sell apparently.

What is going on??? My first thought hearing all of this was that even my kids in elementary school aren't safe. Remember what happened in Russia with the elementary school? Even the media finally realized today that the terrorists are taking notes on where our weak spots are. I was getting angry the first day of the VT massacre when they kept referring to it as 'the worst massacre in American history." Shut up! Some crazy person is going to think, "Oh yeah, I can outdo that." The media just pisses me off sometimes.

I was just thinking about how easy I had it in school. We never worried about this sort of thing.

I was bantering back and forth with some friends via email today about how much high school sucked because of the pressures of being asked to prom and stuff like that. I tell you, cake compared to what our kids have to deal with there now. Drugs, sex and so many more things than what I had to worry about. It really is a crazy world.

I know things will get back to normal, and this is just an odd week with all of the violent anniversaries that are falling within this week. They've all had me thinking.

The hardest part is remembering to teach my kids that worrying about this stuff isn't living life. We can't live in fear, and if you do you are missing out on so much.

Love you all!

adventures in house breaking. Yes, my blog has become all about puppies.

You know how they say that dogs resemble their owners?

I was watching Matthew and Piper the other day, and noticed that they are alike.

Matthew is little, has a ton of energy and even has the same color of hair. Matthew is a yellow lab.

These two are so great together. I think that Matthew is the one who is going to end up bonding with piper the most. They are inseparable. He loves to watch TV with her sitting on his lap, and he plays with her outside. He also takes her out to go potty (sometimes) and the best is that he is SO gentle with her. Matthew can be a little rough sometimes (just ask Trevor!) but he just pats her nicely and reminds me that the way to pick up a puppy is one hand on her butt so she feels safe. I catch him all the time telling her how much he loves her, and he has told me that HE picked out the best puppy EVER.

Today I am channeling my inner Monk. I have picked up a few accidents of the solid kind the past few days. Even though she still has been doing great about going outside... house breaking just plain old sucks. - But I started to freak out and get a little germophobic. If I have found the solid ones, have there been any of the other ones that I may have missed??? So far, 3 rooms done. Plus I have company coming on Saturday night for the big Pea crop. I can't have Lisa feeling like she is slumming it down here in Gilbert. ;) Her house is FAB!

I'm feeling a little better today. I had a better night sleep last night which helped. Plus it is almost the end of the month. a l m o s t.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Nothing new here.

Burnt out.


Ready for some company.

Totally looking forward to May!

Monday, April 16, 2007


Maddy. Everybody should know somebody like Maddy. Today, I need to celebrate Maddy. Just because.

I think everybody needs to blog today, and tell their Maddy stories. That way we can all do a little sucking up, and she gets the updates that she craves! ;)

I met Maddy at the first 2Peas crop (hosted by the fabulous Shanna!) I can't even remember what year, but Matthew was a baby, so was Haley, Lisa's adorable little girl that I got to hold after we snuck into the CK convention. After coming back to go to the bathroom, this bouncy girl comes up to me and says in one spunky run on sentence, "You look NOTHING like your avatar!!! Come on! We're going to SONIC to get SLUSHIES!!!! YAY!!!!" You have to know Maddy, she is like a cheerleader for everything. Almost....

I think Michelle was in that car too that night... along with some freaky nut total left wing girl that was griping the entire time that she was actually sitting in a gas guzzling waste of our environmental resources ozone crushing suburban. Thanks for letting me sit next to her girls. :p

Now I know that my parents taught me better than to get in a suburban with a bunch of women that I just met, and talked to on the internet. Haha! I mean, I met them through 2Peas.... therefore they HAVE to be normal right!?!? Hahahahahaaa!

We ended up not getting slushies from Sonic, but ended up someplace where Maddy and I had the worst nachos ever. By the time we got back to the crop, Lisa had left and I thought for sure I wouldn't ever hear from her again. We clicked. Years later, I realize that we NEEDED each other. ;)

Now on to explain my "she is like a cheerleader for everything... almost." The almost comes from when I went to CKU with Maddy and Michelle. Long story short, we needed a pull out bed in our room. It wasn't there, and Maddy and I went to talk to the person at the front desk. He was not helpful at all, and suggested that Maddy and I share a bed because he and his girlfriend (which by the looks of him I doubt he actually HAD.) do. To which Maddy responded with slapping her hand on the counter, and pointing the other in the air and me, yelling, "WE DON'T SPOOOOON!" A moment I'll never forget and we still laugh about.

We love Maddy. She has the best taste and has a fabulously decorated house. She is the best over achieving mom that I know. She is the card and invitation making bomb. And I also know that she doesn't like the color red, but doesn't know how to tell the difference between hot pink and red on a layout. She now owns about every sweater that doesn't fit me anymore because she is always cold at my house, and she has dunking oreos down to a science. She's also the only person I know that has small children and still gets excited about Christmas every year.

Rock on Maddy. We love you!

Since the blogging nazi is at it again (you know who you are! Heehee!) I am updating. Even though I really have nothing to update.

Ever since Piper moved in, my life revolves around making sure I take her outside once an hour. When I'm not doing that, I think I am reading every bit of house breaking information on the internet. Did you know that you are supposed to take them out five minutes after playing, sleeping, eating or drinking??? What else do they do?!?!

Last night was a good night. No accidents. Then first thing this morning, she went out. Of course then after that.... two accidents on the floor. Ugh. They are poop machines, I swear.

I'm obsessed with this right now, so I'm not going anywhere, not doing anything exciting, and have nothing else going on in my life! haha!

Megan did ride her bike to school this morning for the first time. This is some special week for helmet safety and bike riding. Guess who couldn't find her helmet? I did follow her to school just to make sure she did ok. It is quite a ride for her. She said she loved it though, and maybe she'll do this for the rest of the school year. Which.... isn't much longer! I think one more month! That is SO hard to believe.

Saturday, April 14, 2007


Yeah, another puppy post - but how can you not want to see that face again? ;)

Puppy: day 2.

In the distance, a far away train whistle......

crickets chirping.......

crisp, cold air.......

yeah... 2:00 a.m. and the first night time potty break. It's been a long time since I have seen 2:00 a.m. like this. Not since Matthew was a baby I guess. (Not that I took him outside to potty in the middle of the night, but you know what I mean.)

I took her downstairs after I woke up from hearing her cry. Right when we went outside she went over to what is now her favorite spot and did her puppy stuff. Yessssss! A few hours later, more whinning and Mike's turn to take her outside. Same routine. I *think* we might be able to breeze through the house breaking process. I almost hate to type that out or even think it because I am afraid of jynxing myself! But *knock on wood* so far so good. Maybe what seemed tough at one time in my life is actually cake compared to having newborns in the house. ;) Don't get me wrong, I'm prepared.... I am just feeling pretty lucky right now.

She also got her first bath. I had to get a picture because I know someday she isn't going to fit in that sink.

Other than that, she seems to be fitting in with the family just fine. All of the kids adore her, Missy loves her, but the cats both have their noses a little out of joint because of her. They both did that Halloween cat imitation as soon as they saw her. Haha, just wait until she gets big enough to crush them if she sat down on them!

And why is it when something is CUTE we want to bite them? Or squish them? I hear it all the time, and I have to admit that I just want to bite Piper's nose. You know, how you say a baby is so cute you want to squish it or bite its toes? Where does this come from???

Friday, April 13, 2007

Piper comes home

I never would have thought when I woke up this morning that I would end up with a puppy today. :)
Our poor dog Missy is getting up in years, and every morning when I see other people out walking their dogs I want to be out there with them! Missy gets sore when she is out for longer than a walk down our street.
So, I have always wanted a lab. I figured we'd have much more time to look for one, but today ended up being the day. Mike (who is home for the weekend!) and I were driving down a street after having lunch. I saw a sign on a fence that said "Lab puppies." I made the awww face, and he turned the car around. At first I was like, "No. Drive. Go. I don't want to see cute puppies and you are just playing with my head." He called and we went into a backyard to see this huge litter of puppies! 10 of them all together. I knew I wanted a girl, and the woman pulled all of the girls out for us to look at. The other girls all started running around like crazy, but this little girl was hanging back and being kind of mellow. I was in love already, and she picked went up and picked Mike. That was it, and this dog went home with us today.
Her name is Piper. Yeah, an airplane related name, but believe it or not was my idea. We were at the airport one day and I saw one of the plane mechanics with his lab. I got the aww mushy face again and heard the guy say, "Come on Piper." I loved the name. I knew I wouldn't have a hard time convincing Mike that we should name her that. ;)
So here is Piper. :)

Thursday, April 12, 2007

a pretty day.

Today we were a little early picking up the kids from school, so Matthew and I stopped at this place near my house. The weather was beautiful - a little overcast, windy, and the perfect temperature. I LOVE days like this. We watched the ducks for awhile. It was so nice just to sit back and watch him play, run around the grass, listen to the huge fountain behind us and finally just breathe. It seems like we are always on the go lately. This was one of those moments that just felt good. I was thinking about the time that Matthew and I get to spend together while the other two kids are in school. It is awesome. As much as I do love being able to sneak off and do an errand without somebody with me, I realize that I really do enjoy the constant companionship. If he wasn't with me today I doubt I would have stopped to spend a half hour watching ducks and enjoying being outside. I thought of the things that I did with each of my children as they were at this age too. When it was just Megan and I. Then when Megan went off to school, I spent days with Trevor. Now he's in school too, and it is just Matthew and I. I'm glad that I have been able to stay home with all of them and love having the time that we spend together. Even if he does ask me a million questions a day. ;)

Sunday, April 08, 2007

happy easter

Happy Easter!

I'm taking a break from extreme cleaning. I have company on the way. That tends to freak me out a little bit. I'm not sure why. Or maybe it is motivation? Who knows.

I finally finished up all of the easter stuff late last night. Trevor had a hard time falling asleep since he was so excited. He kept coming downstairs to tell me that he wasn't tired. He finally was out at 11:30, and then I got busy.

I have to admit that I was a little surprised that Megan is still into the E.B. thing this year. I would have thought for sure that some 3rd grader would have spoiled it. I can tell that she isn't just playing along with me because when I was putting her basket in her room I noticed a paper that she had written on.

It said:

"Dear Easter Bunny from Megan. Happy Easter. Thank you for the basket that you will be leaving. If you don't mind, can I have your autograph? Love, Megan."

She has it proudly displayed on her bulletin board and seemed awestruck that he would take the time to sign a piece of paper for her. Awwww. :)

I'm always glad when a holiday comes and goes and I still have all three believing. That is cool. Kids just grow up way too fast, and I have to admit that I love the whole secret thingie. It is equally as fun for the parents!

Oh, and Megan woke me up at 3:00 in the bloody A.M. to tell me that he had already been by. Arg. Nobody should be up at that hour. Soon followed by little boys who were up way too early too. Hopefully tonight will be an early to bed night!

So happy easter to everybody today. I hope you got a lot of chocolate! Mwah!

Saturday, April 07, 2007

horses with humor!




I had to post these tonight since tomorrow is Easter, and we'll be having company over.
Today when we went to the stable I pulled up to THIS. I just laughed so hard. What a cutie! (for non horse people, they can see through these fly masks. I had to tell the boys that it was a good thing and somebody wasn't being mean by putting something over the horse's eyes. It just means that it is summer and the horses don't get bothered by flies in their eyes. )
I had one on my horse years ago, but I have never seen ones like this!!! I can't tell you how cute these were! I found myself talking and looking into these 'fake eyes' instead of where the real horse's eyes were. I was trying to explain to these horses that I was laughing with them and not at them. ;) - I didn't want to hurt their feelings. ;)
However since they were such good sports, they earned a few extra carrot treats.
Trevor named this one "Hollywood" because, well you know.... he is wearing sunglasses. LOL!

what goes around - comes around.

I have slacked on my picture a day so far haven't I?

I passed this place today on the way home from taking M for her riding lessons.

I was laughing a bit as I realized that this store is my punishment for all the times that I have made Mike circle the parking lot at Scrapbooks ETC while I run in for - what I promise - is only 10 quick minutes. I realize that 10 always turns into more, and I always find that mike and the kids have found a parking spot while waiting for me.

Now it is my turn to do my time. I have spent literally hours (collectively) sitting in this parking lot. A couple times I have gone in, but the cool headphones, and airplane part goodies are too tempting for Matthew not to touch. You break it you buy it is NOT a lesson I want him to learn here. So we sit in the car and watch the airplanes fly by. The cool thing about this place is that it is on the approach to sky harbor, so we count the planes while they are landing. WHeeee. We know how to have fun!

So believe... what goes around comes around. Let's just say that my trips inside the scrapbook store are much quicker these days, or I find a way to go in when I don't have kids with me. Lesson learned. ;)

Thursday, April 05, 2007

I love Target, hate migraines.

I am finally up and amongst the living today. This morning I woke up with one of the worst migraines I have had in a long time. One of those when even the dark house with every blind shut still hurts your head. Thank goodness though, I'm finally feeling better. Matthew has enjoyed a bit of a Backyardigans marathon because of it.

This past week must be catching up to me. I have been staying up too late and trying to do everything by myself. House projects, and other things. I think this is finally my body's way of saying, "Um, hello.... I need a bit of a break, and while your at it how about a real coke from McDonald's instead of that diet pepsi stuff you switched me too?"

Does Target read my mind?? I get an email from them every morning. I know, surprising to some of you I'm sure. ;)

This morning was about free shipping on patio furniture. It is almost freaky how they do this to me, and it isn't the first time. I wish that instead of sending me the email they would just send along a little note that said, "Hey Kerry, for being such an incredible customer over the years, here is a gift card with unlimited dollar amount. Pick yourself out an awesome table set." I mean, really.... I don't even want the expensive one! LOL. It would be so easy!

With our great weather lately, wishing I could eat lunches and dinners outside with the kids and probably the fact that I'll have company on Easter day, I have had patio furniture on the mind lately. This one especially:

I'm thinking and hoping that the next time I have to open the Tylenol bottle, a little Target genie will pop out and grant my wish. Hey, it helps to pass the day a little quicker you know? ;)

Now I think I might actually go GET that coke.

all is right in the world.

I have been so bummed about this season of survivor. Usually I have a favorite player either by the beginning episode, or at least a few weeks into it. I faithfully watch. Every season.

I'm late watching last weeks episode until tonight when I watched a little bit of it with Trevor. (He is my reality tv buddy. Survivor and Amazing Race.) I wonder if Trevor's love for Survivor comes from the first season when I watched while I was pregnant with him. Then when the second season came on, his tiny baby self would sit in my arms while we watched it. Had I known this, I should have named him Jeff. (Jeff Probst for you non survivor watching people.. coughcoughLisa&LAURAcoughcough!) ;)

But I finally have a favorite.


That guy is funnnnny. Tonight I loved the way he was joking about calling exile island "Earl island." I forget what was so funny the week before, but same thing... he made me laugh. He seems like he has a great personality. He couldn't have gotten much air time, because I swear he was flying under the radar. Wasn't he the poor guy who couldn't make instant coffee?

So now I am SO happy to have somebody to root for!

I know, exciting news coming from me tonight, but trust me, this is a big deal. I live for Survivor and felt weird not really caring much this season. The ONLY thing I cared about was getting rid of Rocky, which now has happened! Yessssss.

All is right in my little reality TV world.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

look! Another son! Yes, I have TWO!

My OTHER son... for Maddy. ;)

I couldn't believe how big this guy looks in this picture. That is one cool looking 1st grader.

Nothing new and exciting here. Matthew and I made it out to Target earlier today. I was so excited to have found TWO more cars from the movie Cars. These things seem to be off the shelf as soon as they are unpacked at the store. I have to say that Matthew is pretty lucky to have a mom that has this compulsive disorder of feeling like when I collect something, I HAVE to have them all. My friend Jayme is the same way, and we are trying to cover as many Targets in the Phoenix metro area to find them all.

Today I found Boost and Snot Rod. It was a very happy day. Happy also because Matthew has spent hours playing with them. I let him think the cars are for him, but I love them. ;)

Easter. Man, I thought I was ready for Easter. I'm not. I still have to go out and buy a few more things for the kids. I tell you that I am *this close* to blowing the whole E.B. thing. I won't, and I'll be glad I didn't by Easter morning, but it sure would make things much easier right now.

Speaking of Easter... when exactly did Good Friday become called "spring holiday?"

Monday, April 02, 2007

YES! I have a SON! - and he brings me flowers. Before she mentions it, I have another son who will be tomorrow's picture of the day. :p (Maddy keeps me in check, although she doesn't realize yet that boys seem to RUN from the camera, which is why I always have pictures of Megan, who runs TOWARD the camera.) I promise there is no favoritism going on, which is why I think I need to do a page someday about this very thing. If I ever hear, "Why aren't there more pictures of ME???" I'm going to show my boys the hundreds of pictures of them that are blurry, or have a hand over their face, or they think they are being silly and making funny faces that make me grouchy.


Today we went to the park. I have another little boy over today, and the weather was pretty nice. Since getting his new bike, Matthew has found freedom and asks me ALL THE TIME if he can go for a ride around the block.

We stopped at the park for awhile, where he found a bunch of bushes with flowers on them. He yanked this one out of the ground, fell on his butt from pulling it so hard, and brought it over to me. Awww. Nothing is cuter than a little fist with a flower in it. :)

Oh, and notice the little tiny hairs that are finally coming back on his head?!?!?